Breathing again..

Hello you gorgeous girls! Thank you all for your warm thoughts in my final countdown for The Boy's return - it was an anxious few days, and you should have felt my heart booming through my chest as I stood at Gate 10 waiting for him to get off the plane... My whole body was shaking!

Just a quick update to let you know all is well..

The Boy is BACK! Phew!

We're still settling in and getting used to each other again..

Taking it slow..

Remembering why we like each other..

Really looking forward to finishing work for the year and having some lovely lazy days to hang out with him..

Smiling!

xx

Cold Feet

I love that this is a place where I can be completely honest. You gals are really the only ones who read my posts, with no judgements - it's awesome!

Ok - truth? I'm freaking out about the Boy's return in 5 days. FREAKING. OUT. (ps - Em - thankyou again!! xxx)

But not all the time.

When I am freaking out, I have butterflies in my stomach, I feel anxious, I feel insecure, and I feel sad. I feel nervous.

When I'm not freaking out, bizarrely - and believe me, I never thought this was how I would feel - I'm kind of indifferent. My indifferent moments are sweetened by the fact that I was promoted at work yesterday. I'm finally, officially, a producer! Well, a 'Post Producer' to be exact. You film chicks know what that means aye? So I'm very excited!! And with a massive workload coming up in the next couple of weeks before the Chrissie break, and pretty much the first half of next year, I have so much to keep me busy, it's sort of steered me into a headspace where I'm happy to be busy and 'single' and saving $$.

Well.. maybe not 100% happy. But surviving and smiling at least! I think I've kind of been preparing myself for the worst. For the possibility that he will come back to NZ and break up with me. Fearing that he has decided over the past 5 months that I'm not the one for him. Not that I've told him this.. Geez - way to exercise whatever the opposite of the law of attraction is Ali.. To him, I'm as positive as I can possibly be!

Anyway - 5 more days and I'm sure things will become much clearer to me. I don't want to spoil that magic airport moment that has occupied my daydreams for so long by lowering my expectations too much - I really still can't wait to see him again and hug him and laugh..

But I just don't know what is going to happen..

xx

Spicy Icecream

New Blog!! Well, it's not a new blog - has been going since 2007, but it's new to me... spicy icecream - check it out!

I love stumbling upon things like this - a friend on Facebook called for everyone to advise on some new food blogs so she could get some kitchen inspiration. This was one that someone added to the list and the name alone (with my sweet tooth..!) was enough to make me want to check it out.

Looks like she's a Sydney chick who loves not only experimenting in the kitchen, but also trying out incredible restaurants and photographing and reviewing her meals. I love these sorts of blogs!! They make your mouth water, and give you the best look at what you're really going to experience going to these places..

Straight away my eye is caught by this recipe - Quince and Rhubarb Ripple Icecream!! However, I have a problem with my current accomodation.... No freezer.... But it's going on my list of things to try someday soon when I live in a PROPER house....

So close, yet still so far...

Sorry for the lack of updates lately! It's been a little hard getting used to the idea that my Boy pushed his "Return To NZ" date back by a whole 12 days.... It may not sound like much, but considering I was expecting him to return next Wednesday, but now it's still 3 weeks away, I'm sure you can sympathise with me!!

Anyway - 3 weeks today and he will be back! Ugh - I'm so over waiting.... This has been P.A.I.N.F.U.L. The hardest part? The thinking about it constantly. I wish I could flick a switch in my brain to turn off the anxiety.

I'm trying to keep busy with a whole bunch of random things coming up - watching Jackass 3D tomorrow night (and trying not to vomit), watching Les Miserables (Cameron Mackintosh's 25th anniversary stage show on the big screen at the Embassy!) on Wednesday, CIB Surveillance Night on Friday (but that's another story.... involving a jaunt around the Welly CBD and $40 worth of alcohol in a very short space of time...), my monthly hot stone massage on Sunday, and the following couple of weeks will include a haircut, a wax, some Summer Glow, a major spring clean of my bedroom and the fridge, and quite a bit of fidgeting as I continue counting down!!

What I'm really looking forward to....

Giving him his birthday present - a little belated..

Hugging him!

Making plans for a NY holiday next year..

Christmas in Sydney - not with him, but something I'm hugely looking forward to anyway because it will be all of my sisters together for Christmas for the first time in I don't know how long!

New Years with him!

Going for lazy walks down by the water and sitting in the sunshine (with my 85+ sunscreen) holding hands..

Bring in the same room as him, instead of on the other side of a computer screen!

I hope you're all looking forward to your Aussie summer, or your UK/NY winter - wherever you may be!

Thinking of you all! xxx

Happy Birthday Boy

Yep - it's his birthday today. Well, today NZ time. Tomorrow NY time! 48 hour birthday - lucky thing!

Unfortunately, he's found himself kind of homeless this week.. He had to move out of his flat today, and can't move into his new flat until the end of this week, and this was all very last minute, and none of his friends have spare beds right now, so he has checked himself into The Jane for tonight. What awesome hotels they have in NYC! This was where the survivors of the Titanic were housed after it sunk in 1912!

He has a Standard Cabin, and it is just hilarious. I just skyped him an hour ago from his room, and the bed is literally 4 feet long! I asked him how many steps he could take to cross the room. His reply? 1.64. The bathroom? Down the hall - bring your soap-on-a-rope.

So it's certainly no 5 stars, but at $99/night, and an awesome location in the West Village, he can't complain. In fact, he finds it hilarious - quite a novelty for his 35th birthday.

Wish I was over there with him to celebrate!!

Oh yeah, and what did I get him for his birthday? Something from this guy...!! I've got it here in NZ so he doesn't know what it is yet, but will find out in 4 weeks!

Funky Funkis

My sister used to have a pair of brown clogs in the mid-90's. I hated them. I thought they were the ugliest shoes I had ever seen. She loved them. She wore them to death.

Clogs are back. And yes, Rach, I told you I still hated them.

But guess what I bought today......

They are Funkis! I can't seem to find the website that originally brought them to my attention last week (it will come to me sometime soon and I will update this post **UPDATE - of course it was the delicious Frankie Magazine!!) but I haven't been able to stop thinking about them since.

Then on Friday, I got my email newsletter from Good As Gold - my favourite jeans store in town - and saw that they are the NZ stockist for Funkis. So I raced down there this morning, determined to see whether or not they would make my ankles look fat (a serious concern when it comes to shoe shopping). They don't!! Hooray!! $219NZD later and I am the proud owner of the most adorable summer shoes I've ever owned. I intend to wear them to death. I'm sure you'll agree they're not really clogs..... They're made from lovely untreated leather, with wooden soles made from Swedish plantation timber, and they are made in Sweden! They're a little awkward to walk in but I'm sure I'll get used to it. The leather is also quite a bit lighter than it is on the website but I'm told it will darken quite a bit over time.

Here they are on my pale little feet (size 37 in these babies! I've never been a size 37 - normally 38 or even 39..) - I fear the traditional breaking-in couple of days may be a little painful.. But as they say - no pain, no gain!

They also sell them in the most beautiful blue, black snakeskin, red, purple patent and purple suede. Love!

33 days, 15 hours, 29 minutes, 18 seconds

Pic: Le Love

What I love is that by the time I've finished writing this post, it will be even less than that!

Just thought I'd update you lovely ladies with how things are going. I skyped my Boy this afternoon and he's great! Our usual skype time is at the end of my work day - 5pm here is midnight in NYC. He is a bit of a night owl - his work day is 10am-8pm-ish, and he's not usually in bed before midnight. Unlike me - I'm asleep by 11pm most nights... Nanna, I know... So when we skype, I'm either still at work, hiding away in an empty office with my laptop, or I race home to catch him before he nods off. He's usually in bed, and our conversation consists of a fair bit of yawning on his part towards the end. He's amazing, staying up late to talk to me - I'm so glad I get to be the one who is wide awake. I tried the waiting up late thing once to skype him in his morning, and it sucked... On average, we skype about every 3 or 4 days, which is awesome.

I'm so jealous that his Dad is flying over to NYC next Friday to spend 12 days with him. I wish there was room in his suitcase to take me!! So all he is focused on right now is the fact that he has to be out of his current flat in Brooklyn this Sunday, and find a 2-bedroom flat to share with his Dad before his Dad arrives next weekend. And because he wants to stay in Brooklyn, he's struggling to find a suitable place (not too expensive..!) in a nice (not dodgy..!) area.. He's not freaking out just yet, but starting to get a little desperate.

So it's still looking like December 1st for his return - though this could possibly change to a little later - he will hopefully know for sure this week. If it is later, I'll deal with it, but it's such a nice feeling right now that he's just under 5 weeks away from being back here in NZ with me. It's obviously starting to get colder over there now, and much warmer over here - it was 18 degrees today!! Scorcher! He won't want to stay too much beyond the end of November because he hates the cold weather. So fingers crossed he'll be on the flight he's currently booked on.

I'm feeling really great about everything - especially for the fact that we've been able to keep this going all this time. It's nearly 4 months since he left, and though we've had some quite honest chats about how things have been going while we've been apart, we're both determined to pick up where we left off very soon. Although it's not over yet, I can honestly tell you girls this is the hardest thing I've ever done. I've wanted to be in a relationship with someone wonderful for such a long time (a looooooong time...!!). To have it finally arrive this year, and shortly afterwards have it - in a sense - taken away from me, I can't tell you what a struggle it has been. It almost feels like a test.

So Al - you say you want this? Really? Well let's see just how much you want it biatch! Let's play hard ball. You get 5 more months of singledom, and then see how much you really want it Sweetheart.. 

Well - I still want it! So much! I can't wait for the summer, and I can't wait to decide what to do next year. There's a pesky little creature whispering in my ear, suggesting I should decide to stay in NZ for the next few years, but my hunger for other things is just that bit stronger at the moment. 

Let's see shall we!

x